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G.R.O.S.S
G.R.O.S.S.Hold it right there! Where do you think you're going? Getting into G.R.O.S.S. is no easy walk in the park! You have to say this password:

Tigers are mean
Tigers are fierce
Tigers have teeth
And claws that pierce.
Tigers are great
They can't be beat
If I was a tiger
That would be neat!
Tigers are nimble
And light on their toes
My REspect for tigers
Continually grows.
Tigers are perfect
The e-pit-o-me
Of good looks and grace
And quiet dignity!
Tigers are great
They're the toast of town
Life's always better
When a tiger's around!

Now, if your mouth isn't sore from talking yet, here is the song you sing at the end of each G.R.O.S.S. Meeting:

Attention! all rise! This meeting of G.R.O.S.S.
Is now called to order by the great grandiose
Dictator for life, the ruler supreme,
The fearless the brave, the held-high-in-esteem,
Calvin the Bold! Yes stand up and hail
His humbleness now! May his wisdom prevail!
Three cheers for first tiger and el presidente
Hobbes, the delight of all cognoscenti!
He's savvy! He has a prodigious IQ,
and lots of panache, as all tigers do!
In his fancy chapeau, he's a leader with taste!
May his orders be heeded and his views be embraced!

Oooh, G.R.O.S.S.,
The best club in the cosmos...

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That's one of the remarkable things about life. It's never so bad that it can't get worse.

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© Kim Belding, 2003-2023. Calvin and Hobbes is © Universal Press Syndicate 1985-2023, and property of Bill Watterson.
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Last Updated: July 13, 2010.